June 20th, 2015

It seems as though when people talk about losing a grandparent or great-grandparent, or even an aunt or uncle, it doesn't seem as sad as losing someone with more... significance. Like, a sibling or parent.

That is a lie.
Losing someone hurts all the same, regardless of their title.

It is often that I am afraid of such stereotypical assumption. I, myself, has had that assumption. I would like to say that it is far from the truth, and I should just kick myself right now for ever thinking that.
Two years ago, I lost someone who had the utmost amount of significance in my life and others' lives. To this day, that certain amount of significance shows tremendously.

It shows when the sun is out and the birds are chirping and there is a certain hole left unfilled. It shows during family gatherings and nobody knows where a certain pan is or why the utensils aren't where they should be. It shows through the eyes of my grandfather when he pulls me in for a tight hug. It shows. 
However, we manage. We carry on with our lives. But, there will always be that gap.... The gap between the impact of a life that brought so much liveliness to life and the reality of what life is now.

Though, I find myself avoiding these thoughts- how I lost my grandmother. The process and our memories... I am not sad. No, I am happy that God gave me someone whom I allowed to touch my heart and help me grow into the person I am now. I am happy that she left a mark on this world and that she is remembered through and through. I am happy that she was so much more than her title. I am happy that I have someone to miss.

I love you, Mimi. You are my sunshine.


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xx Kenzie