Blogtober: Day Eleven

  Hello my dear readers. <3 It is current Sunday, October 11th, which means I have to rant about something. I am actually kind of glad about this topic, there are a few things I would like to get off my shoulders.. one in particular. It's kind of personal though... But I think I need to get it out. So... shall we begin?

Today I will be ranting about life.

Yes... of all the topics I could choose, I choose the one that connects to the root of all rants: Life. 

You know what I really hate about life? It gives you something, then takes it away from you. Just like that. I know there is a reason for everything, and I know God knows the way... but please. Please just let me talk about life in a metaphoric way that makes "life" a noun- thank you. 

And let the rant, begin...

  I just... UGH. I hate you, Life. 
 I hate that you gave me someone who made me the happiest person in who could ever live. Then, just like that... with the snap of your pesky fingers, you took that someone away from me. And you know what else? I hate the fact that you, Life, sat there while we tried to make things work and just laughed when it didn't. 

 I'm trying here, okay? 

 You don't understand, Life. You don't understand what it is like to have someone who makes you feel so many things... from anger to excitement; from hurt to love... That person made me feel alive. Isn't that funny? Aren't you the one who is suppose to make me feel alive, Life? Well, guess again.
 That person, the one I chose over and over again (who I continue to choose), you didn't allow me to choose- you wouldn't give me a choice! You just decided for yourself that this was how it was going to end and that was it. Why did it have to end? Why couldn't things go as they planned? Why must you mock me like this? I bet you enjoy my tears, I bet you enjoy the frustration I feel when I tug at my hair. I bet you devour every second of sobbing and pleading and begging. I bet you just love seeing the hurt flash across my eyes when you took, not one, but two people away from me in a single year. Within months! ...You took her away from me, why did you do that?

I won't forgive you. 

But I will forever be thankful for the things you let happen, and while they did. 

And I won't give up, no matter how hard you push me. 


(I apologize for the dramatic post, I tend to become very passionate about things that make me, well, feel.)

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xx Kenzie